Gettn’ Down With Ethiopia’s Thugtators!

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guard of honor for Obama
Do you really want to know how the “Black Caesars” of the TPLF rock and rolled with Il Padrone, the Godfather, in the house? (AFP/Getty Images)

By Prof. Alemayehu G. Mariam,

GET down, like James Brown! Dances with the stars? Dances with wolves? How about dances with thugs! The Godfather of Soul, or as his fans call him J.B. (R.I.P. J.B.) had a song called, “The Boss”. It’s a cut on the soundtrack album for the movie “Black Caesar”.

The movie is about an African American man who joins the New York mafia and becomes the head of a black crime syndicate in Harlem.

The lyrics to “The Boss” are earthy and gutsy:

I paid the cost to be the boss / Look at me you know what you see/
You see a bad mutha / Look at me you know what you see
You see a bad mutha / Paid the cost to be the boss
Told you so!/ Havin’ fun, got money to burn

Why on earth am I writing about “Black Caesar” and “bad muthas with money to burn”?

Well, to understand why, you must first watch the following short video.

Here is the question:

What did Barack Obama and his crew do last week in Addis Ababa when they were not lecturing and hectoring the “dumb” Ethiopians that their “government elected by 100 percent of the votes is democratically elected.”?

They were gettin’ down like James Brown!

Did you check out the TPLF “Black Caesars” (that is, the Tigrean People’s Liberation Front bosses) in the video sitting at the round tables lookin’ all prim and trim?

Don’t they look like “bad muthas with money to burn”?

Or are they just lookin’ at they women gettin’ down.

Check out Gayle Smith! Sure looks like she is doing the Watusi.

Patricia Haslach (the U.S. Ambassador to Ethiopia) is shakin’ her booty. Shake it, Patty! Shake it!

But where the hell is my friend Wendy “Ethiopia is a young Democracy” Sherman?

Would have loved to see her grooving to the beat. The beat goes on. “Ethiopia is a young democracy!” La di da di da, La di da di da… (That’s Sonny and Sher, not J.B.)

The “Foursome Fearsome” would have been awesome to watch gettin’ down to the ground.

Shake it Susan!

Rock it Gayle!

Swing it Patty!

Get down, windy Wendy!

But Susan Rice ain’t dancin’. She just be walking the dance floor.

Is she doin’ the “Walk like an Egyptian” dance? Like the girl band “Bangles” did it.

Susan Rice is doin’, “Walk like ??”. I don’t know.

Sheee be swankin’ like Olivia Newton-John in “Grease.”

She ain’t smilin’.

She sure as hell ain’t laughin’ like she laughed her behind off when she told a reporter, “The Ethiopian government is democratically elected. Absolutely, by one hundred percent.”

Mwahahaha! Mwahahaha! Mwahahaha!

Doggone it! That was the heartiest laugh by a public official I seen since Bill Clinton cracked up laughing in 1995 after Boris Yeltsin told the press they “are a disaster.”

Susan Rice was a “disaster” laughing at the Ethiopian elections.

But why shouldn’t she laugh at a joke election?

Like it is, if the TPLF election is good enough for Susan to laugh at, who am I to judge? (Hee hee hee hee…)

Maybe Rice was just rollin’ on the dance floor and keepin’ an eye on her posse having fun.

She whispers something in Gayle Smith’s ears.

It must have been like a grand 30th reunion for Gayle and the old TPLF crew.

Did y’all know Gayle used to work for the TPLF way back when. Yeah! She was on the payroll in 1984 04 ’85. (Now she be tryin’ to snag the USAID Administrator gig.)

The Senate is sitting on her nomination. I don’t know what’s up with old Mitch McConnell.

Obama nominated Smith April. She had her hearing in June.

The Senate will be in recess from August 10 to September 7.

I predicted in June she would be confirmed by the Senate in a jiffy.

I promised to eat my hat if she went down in the Senate. (I certainly don’t like eating hats, but I will gladly make an exception in Smith’s case.)

I vigorously opposed Smith’s nomination in The Hill.

The par-TAY in Addis looked like a TPLF thug-fest to me.

Everybody doin’ the “Thug Shuffle”.

The “Black Caesars” just looking on. Bobbin’ and weavin’ their heads. Shakin’ it.

Talking about getting’ down, did y’all see how Obama got down in Kenya?

“O” can get down like James Brown.

Did y’all see how the Kenyans received O-baamaa?

“O” got a helleva honor guard reception in Nairobi, Kenya.

I am not into pomp and circumstance.

But the Kenyans let “O” know he IS the PREZ. They pulled out all the stops.

The ceremonial honor guards in smart uniforms stood at attention with rifle in salute position, body erect and chest lifted.

A naval cannon saluting battery blasted away.

Red carpets everywhere. Obama is escorted by three high ranking officers from the Kenyan Army, Navy and Air Force as he reviewed his honor guard.

My friend Uhuru Kenyatta standing right there.

Just compare that to the treatment Obama got in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

Shame! Shame! Low-down dirty shame!

The TPLF pulled out the Thug Patrol from the neighborhood barracks for Obama’s honor guard reception.

They conducted the honor guard ceremony at the front door of Emperor Haile Selassie’s old palace.

A humongous portrait of Haielmariam Desalegn, the ceremonial prime minister, is sitting on the concrete driveway just behind “The Beast”, the presidential limo.

Why HD’s enlarged photo would be sitting the driveway concrete is beyond me.

Behind Obama and Hailemariam stood TPLF bosses and U.S. officials including Susan Rice. No smiles. No movement. They look like mannequins.

Obama stood on a Persian rug (for crying out loud a Persian rug!) laid out on the steps of the palace and the concrete driveway.

A whole bunch of area rugs (from Walmart?) appear to be stitched together for a makeshift red carpet for the President to walk on.

It looks like the whole honor guard review took place at a suburban mall parking lot surrounded by a huge convoy of cars right where the president is doing his honor guard review. It is unbelievable!

To add insult to injury, the honor guard detail consisted of “soldiers” clad in harlequin green pants, harlequin green ties and peaked harlequin green caps stood at attention.

For crying out loud, is Obama at a ribbon cutting ceremony for Ringling Bros. Circus? (Who would ever dress up their honor guard in harlequin green? Ask a dumb question, get a dumb answer.)

The Presidential review of the 35 “honor guards” (circus act?) took exactly 59 seconds from beginning to end! (Imagine lining up 35 cadres in green suits to honor the President of the United States!!!)

That must be the way they done did it in the bush.

There was a time when Ethiopia knew how to greet foreign heads of state. First class all the way!

You don’t believe me, watch this video and find out how Ethiopians used to roll when heads of states came out visit them.

H.I.M. Haile Selassie pulled out 60 thousand students to show Queen Elizabeth what Ethiopia’s future looked like!

All I can say is that a color guard at an average American high school could have put on a better show for Barack Obama than the honor guard he got in Addis.

I mean, for crying out loud, when you have the President of the United States, the Commander-in-Chief of the United States visiting you, wouldn’t you pull out all the stops?

Wouldn’t you bust out the best of what you got?

For crying out loud, this is the guy bankrolling you. Your sugar daddy! Your Santa Claus! Your Robin Hood!

Il Padrone is in town and you give him a Mickey Mouse crew reception!? What the hell?!

I keep telling y’all. “Y’all can take the thug out of the bush, but you can’t take the bush out of the thug.”

Whoomp! There it is! Bush thugs with no class.

Someone said you can take a class to do anything: fly a plane, play the piano, build bridges and sky scrapers. But there’s no class to take to be classy. You gotta be born with it! Once a thug, always a thug!

Sorry about that “O”!

It is what it is.

That’s how the “Black Caesars” of the TPLF rock and rolled with Il Padrone, the Godfather, in the house.

To paraphrase what JB said in the “The Boss”:

We paid the cost to be the boss
Look at us you know what you see
You see bad muthas
Havin’ fun, got money to burn.

That’s the way it is in gangastas paradise!

Peace out!